ground rules.

missing shaunchien.

it's been so long. i know. 

exams have been such a pain.

i just feel like all that studying goes nowhere, and when you face the question paper, you do remember flashes of things here and there, but not enough to place an answer and earn your mark. it's utterly frustrating. 

i do realize i still quite enjoy bio, and studying for it, i mean, as much as one can enjoy studying for anything lah. but bio is way better than chem and math.

which is really sucky because majority of my time is spent in chem and math, and my brain seems to have to no power to hold on to it. and now, the next few months just seem a lot tougher.

i don't know how to compare with people taking other courses or what, but this stuff is no joke man. i mean, fine, we already know that spm is nothing compared to this, but i do wonder about the other courses. 

hmm, okay, i don't feel as hopeless as i sound, but today's last paper really got me down. usually i'm like, whatever lah done adi right move on to the next thing, but chem and math are like a a cement block. laced with steel reinforcements. and diamond core. or whatnonsense lah. 

all these crazy people tell you things that you need personality, character, and other talents and abilities to succeed. you fools what people still look for are results okay. lol i dunno what i'm talking about lah i haven't even reached that stage in life yet.

i will not try to make myself humble or what in terms of how much i've studied this past month. (not counting when joseph came back, joel's farewell, and last night) and it's been a lot. i don't really know how much to believe my classmates when they say they haven't been studying much, because i've been studying A LOT and i know what exaggerating means thanks. it's like spm time. only this is mid-terms. HEH.

studying too much makes me moody, and appetite-less.

i still keep up my weekends at church though. it keeps me sane.

i don't even have a point here, i'm just very mehhhhh now.

what's been happening since?

- Joseph came back for like, a day, on labour day. and a few of us went to watch the avengers! :)

(now i must say, i haven't been to the cinema for a long time before that, and of course, since that. it's not that i don't want, i want, but i seem to have to save more money and time recently)

the avengers, was epic. but all i really remember is coming home after that to rest a bit, and study. noob.

but it was nice having jozef around again. :)

- my gramma! is now officially cancer free. and she only had to undergo three chemo sessions. and she really is one person full of awesomeness. she's still positive, and bubbly and funny. and it's fun talking to her, because she's quite faultless as a person. :) she looks young in that photo up there. :)

and she treated the whole family to japanese buffet dinner at mai-u. so naice.

- lower sixers are here! :) quite exciting. i've got carmen now. and the usj 12 juniors. i like. they do seem a bit glum and moody, but i'm sure i was like that as well. :) don't like the squeezing in the assembly though. stupid school. which brings me to my next point.

- usj 12 canteen day! or what hari keusahawanan something lah. i went with john tan, and zechary. or dog and jackery. too formal. haha. why not go back to the ex-school with the ex-classmates? right.

i love kao that school man. i'm bias as heck and i know it, but maybe what i'm saying is true lor. usj 12 is cleaner, and brighter and just more conducive lah. seafield, besides the form 6 block, is really dull and dark and got such an old feeling YES LAH I KNOW THAT SCHOOL IS OVER 30 YEARS OLD lah but it is what it is, i will discriminate.

they changed the prefect room. like i originally proposed, but was too lazy to execute. seafield's prefect room? nonsense. and the prefects just place their bags at the side of nowhere. -_-

and usj12 has a new stage and everything. so prettay. and the bbi. and our old class. :) 

memories lah.

the three of us walked around aimlessly, just meeting our old friends. even if i've never said a word to some of them before, i was so happy seeing them. then i saw izaaz (hensem!) and shahrul, and wen jun. :) and sue chen, fu ying, andrea, and dimitri. 

i always think, if i had that stupid remote from the movie 'Click', i would just spend time going through those memories. haha.

and the teachers! pn lim, pn vijaya, pn shirley, pn evelyn (whom we got to talk to for a long time), pn yek, pn choooooooo and we made it a point to avoid pn heng, and pn regina. :)

they all remembered me! :D and only some remembered dog, and zach. hehe.

i do realized though why i'm so attached to this school, while some of you couldn't wait to leave. i understand it, and would probably feel the same if i were less involved. 

i love the environment, the people, everything. because i feel like i did do SOMETHING there, and it was sort of like a third home.

and one point, the three of us just went up to the first floor and gazed upon the tapak perhimpunan and everybody. :) nice.

the rest of you stupid butts. 

i very lazy to plan outings with you all.

- joel's farewell. yeah he left, to the land where julian is. and no i couldnt go the dramatic airport send off because of exams. at least he gave me a jar of jam before he left. -_- now i can't poke his man boobs anymore. been a good friend for about more than 5 years now. now i miss julian.

i will update more some other time.

by far, the greatest team, the world has ever seen

yes, would you believe it? arsenal's coming back to malaysia. all that i regret not doing last year, motivates me to do all that i can for this year. i've been given a second chance!

the game is dangerously close to my second trials though, and i'm sure it'll cost me a bomb again, so i'll make the most of it.

stalk mode: ON.

shallow little puddle.

another moody post.

sigh. stupid.
miss out on the hot air balloon festival with jess, rhys and lawrence to study kao kao for that stupid chem test.
chem test postponed. -_-
miss out on clement's 21st to study the night before chem test.
takes the chem test.
gets 8 out of 35.

i also don't know what lah now. this, plus everything else. i can't tell if things are getting worse, or i'm just getting more sensitive. i betchu it's a mix of both.

where's the people i can 'count on'?
:(
i think i know what the fella meant, when he posted that 9gag thing where he (i'm sure it's not a girl) wished he could dig a hole in the ground and pretend he was a carrot.

i'm so tired and headachey right now and lol may exam.
this seafield doesn't give up on having events all the time also.

-_-

even when you're gone.

going to do some slammin' today. because i need to get it out.

i have to be real careful how i say this because it's so common for so many of you. 

i'm no fan of the 'smartphone generation' that we are today. it's quite annoying sometimes.

i love my phone i really do. i like wifi. i like my fb. my twitter and whatever else. but i'm not slave bound to it 24/7 okay. i annoy myself when i overuse any of those things, and probably i only use them when i'm sick of studying or need to check some stuff here and there. or when using my computer i just leave it on. and it's fine when i'm alone. right?

well, i think you're crazy if you're constantly glued to your stupid phone/ipad when you're with other people. my gawd. maybe just to say who you're with, or check in or whatever else -_- that's fine. but if you're casually doing alll that that doesn't need to be done, then why the heck are you out in the first place? go home!

can't you enjoy the presence of just hanging out with your friends by talking, and having at least eye contact? what's so important that you're missing out on in cyberland?

even worse if you're playing some stupid game. i think next time, i'll just get up and leave, or go sit with someone who knows how to hold a conversation. 

do you really expect me to believe that you're having fun when all you do is tweet about having fun and checking in and out of wherever the heck you are? 

if I'M having fun, you won't even see my phone, unless I have to urgently reply or check on something. yeesh. and by urgently reply i mean urgent enough to reply asap okay. 

if you want to dissociate so much, then do it, but not at the expense of other people. 

i will throw bricks at you.

singing in the rain, just singing in the rain.

i'm enjoying my holidays immensely. :) 

there's been a lot of talk about stress lately, and honestly, the more you emphasize that you're stressed, the more stressed you'll get! so get over it, and think of better things to do than express your stress.

okay, this isn't directed to anyone in particular, but it does apply to some of you.

i'm not saying i don't vent out my frustrations, but i don't do it regularly and with such intensity okay. 

for muet, pn joyce gave us a topic and an essay on stress. causes, symptoms and ways to overcome. and it made me realize how pitiful we are sometimes. i know it is a fast paced world and it's difficult to keep up without pulling some hairs out here and there, but i would say, stress is just an emotion, and it is a choice on how you handle it.

our lives here are pretty good wouldn't you say? we're at the age where we have good health, abundant energy, independence, freedom, sufficient (and even disposable) income, a roof over our heads, with electricity, water, air con! and wifi!, family and friends with us, and alll the time in the world.

WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU STRESSING ABOUT?

you cannot control everything, don't act as if you don't know that, just let it go, and do something else. :)
you chose your path, try harder!

stress is not an excuse to throw tantrums and fusses, it's not an excuse to procrastinate and not do anything either. 

trust God. everything will be fine.

booga.

this holiday week has been nice :) i wish i were sliggghhhtttly more productive, but so far i think i'm doing good. though, if you take out all the stuff i do for church, then well, you'd see my productivity as much less, coz all i've done is one loooong night of math, and a few sleepy hours of biology. but it's okay though, anybody can study and do work, but not anybody can do what i do for church. #proud

the weather is also awesome. :) i know God doesn't plan weather around me, but i do feel like He told the weather to be extra nice to me this week, so i can enjoy more :D

sleep is an absolute love. :) and football is best enjoyed like this. :)

i'm a simple girl, i take pleasure in simple things. :D